The news makes me wince daily. I still read the paper and I have come to dread the turning of the second page. Each day it seems there is some new revelation about some actor, politician, business leader, or minister who has been accused of sexual misconduct. Their names have become bywords for contempt: Weinstein, Lauer, Spacey, Rose. The list grows daily. Some have resigned; at least one committed suicide; some have tried to quietly escape the public’s attention; others have denied the accusations.

In these disappointing days where our leaders and heroes are shown to be the opposites of their public personas, one might wonder how Christians - and perhaps more specifically, Christian parents - should react to the recent sexual scandals plaguing society.

God’s Word says blunt, clear things about sex:

• A man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife
• The two will become one flesh
• Do not commit adultery
• Love your wife, and respect your husband

Our culture has come to view this clarity as a straight jacket restricting our desires. (Before we think that we are so special, many cultures of the past were even less constrained than ours!) It turns out that our desires, when untethered from God’s law, are pretty darn ugly. During this time, Christians should react by affirming Biblically sanctioned sexual fidelity; by calling for justice for all - victims, the accused, and the guilty; and by helping our society find its way back to God.

Holy Things Need to be Protected

One of the saddest things about the modern world is that so many have lost a connection with the Holy. Profanity is when someone takes something that is holy and makes it common or devalued. Sexuality is one of the most precious gifts that God has given to mankind and sadly one of the gifts that we have most profaned.

While the recent tidal wave of scandals might have surprised or shocked us, it should not. We have, throughout our culture, failed to see the image of God in other people. We have, time and time again, viewed persons as a means to an end rather than seeing them as eternal beings bearing the image of a holy God. Someone commented to me recently that they had recently seen a magazine in the checkout line that was decrying Harvey Weinstein and celebrating Hugh Hefner without seeing the connection between the two. That connection is this: both have used people sexually and in so doing, proven that they see women as things rather than people. The train that is crashing into our culture today has been coming down the tracks for long time now.

So, if we want a culture that is sexually sane, we have to provide people sexual protection. As a father of four daughters, I will clarify this to mean protection especially for women. That protection comes in many forms. It starts with basic respect for the image of God in the people around us. It also includes the protection that comes from affirming the only kind of sexual relationship sanctioned by God: marriage.

All sex involves intimacy and vulnerability. Marriage builds a hedge of protection around sexual freedom by requiring husbands to be maximally committed to their wives. This requirement comes in the form of the terrifying language of Ephesians 5, calling husbands to be to their wives as Christ is to the Church. This means that husbands are called to show sacrificial love for their wives as Christ, who went to the cross for His Bride, did. Men need to be strong - not to oppress or abuse, but to protect, love, and lay themselves down daily for their wives and families.

A first step that Christian parents can take to help our children make sense of the blurred lines and base talk permeating our culture is to model this biblical benchmark of true love. Make your home a place where that which is Holy - including the gift of sexuality - is put in its proper place of honor, and where the perfect love of Christ, which casts out fear, reigns.

As a quick aside, we should be able to see the biggest problem facing sexuality in our culture: our marriages too often fail to reflect the relationship between Christ and the church. If they did - if our culture was full of examples of biblical, committed love - the full horror of these vile travesties of sexuality would be even more sickening to us. Sadly, our love has grown cold. The main fault for this cultural decay must be laid at the feet of Christian men who have, through weakness or callousness, failed to walk the path of loving their wives well.

Seek Truth First, Then Justice

When a charge of sexual misconduct comes up, our culture tends to reel in horror and disbelief. The lurid facts cause us to fall into rage. This rage, however, is too often driven by feelings rather than by principle. If we let our feelings rather than God’s truth guide us, we will not be able to find real justice for victims or sort out truth from error.

The Bible requires that charges be heard and established by competent, unbiased authorities. As a father of girls, my first reaction when I heard that a Today Show host had a button on his desk to lock the door of his office trapping women inside and keeping help from coming was rage. This initial reaction might be right, but feelings must not be the end of the process. When charges are brought, they must be brought to someone who will sort out truth from error and who can establish what actually happened. It comes down to a Biblical application of truth and justice. We are called to seek out truth.

We would expect the same things from our children who encounter hushed gossip at school about their peers (or even themselves). Seek the truth, don't rush to judgment, and ensure that the right information is in the right hands to bring about justice.

Dare or Truth

As believers, we must dare to lead our society back down the path toward submission to God. This submission must involve bringing our heart, soul, mind, strength, and our sexuality to God. Our whole being will either rely on Him or we will forever find ourselves listing from pillar to post in search of some path that leads to peace and joy but that denies the source of peace and joy. That path does not exist. We must repent and dare to return home. If we do, we will find forgiveness and mercy. Sexual sins belie idolatry or selfishness. In both cases, God is replaced by the idol or by self. When God displaces these idols, we can have peace, contentment, and sexual fulfillment.

If we will not dare, we will have to experience the truth. The truth is this: we are not gods and we can’t know how to properly value ourselves or others without God placing a value on both us and them. The truth that we are experiencing now is nauseating. In the dark places of our culture, powerful people too often use their dominance to abuse the vulnerable. Too many leaders, entertainers, athletes, politicians, and pundits have proven that men cut off from God and His standards become brutes—some become monsters. We might be at a turning point now, but if not we will see these lurid stories multiply and stretch into the future until we lose interest and see things move on to the next hashtag that captures the public’s attention.

As a culture, we have to come to grips with the fact that there is no third choice. We will either submit to God’s plan for our sexual lives or we will find ourselves imprisoned in the dark.